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Eraser of Evil Flight School Graduate Drone Warrior Combat Ready Legendary Ant Poisoner Reckless Ant Food Trained Difference Spotter Apocalyptic Missile Commander Protecterra Solving the Melody Feeling the Rhythm Sensing the Beat Causal Gamer Flux to Be You Teeter-Totter to the TARDIS Paradox Shmaradox Speed Razor Fulp Fiction Wool Whacker New Doeo King Profesioeo Rodoeo Spectral Selection You're Doing It Wrong Prismatic Rampage Up to 11 Keyboard Hero String Theorist First Picks Illuminator Alive Monsters Sensei Slayer Escape from White November To the Extreme! PC Load Letter Bloated Defense Budget Still Alive Title Trasher Snakes on a Trophy Action Potential Spherical Ninja Rollin' On Up Rolling Start S-Mart Shopper Real-World Geometry
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2008/05/13

Chronotron



At last, we have some decent puzzler under highlight - "Chronotron".

Paradox Shmaradox Badge (easy – 5 points)
Survive an early encounter with a potential paradox in level 6.

Puzzles that combining the elements of time travels and causalities together are nothing new at all, from the earlier days of the memorable "Day of the Tentacle" to casual games as recent as Cursor*10, we've all seen plenty of them already. Yet, the intrinsically curious and bizarre nature of the theme makes it a worthwhile direction for talented designers attempting to come up with some innovative and inspirational creations that can impress people with new ideas, proving the depth and complexity around this theme.


Teeter-Totter to the TARDIS Badge (medium – 15 points)
Complete the easy, basic, and medium levels.

For "Chronotron", the clever part is most likely about the existence of paradoxes; they exist because you are required to return to your starting point (i.e. the time machine) to create a next incarnation, and with your past selfs not immune to new changes around their environments, paradoxes can happen. Some less ingenious developers may regard this as a kind of "potential glitch" and seek to rid it of by, say, altering a few game rules, but for "Chronotron", though minor glitches out of the said causes do still occur some of the time, under most cases these paradoxes have been just successful in seasoning the whole game with further brainstorming fun, all reasonable and intriguing.


Flux to Be You Badge (hard – 30 points)
Retrieve the Flux Capacitor.

Completing this game should be a joyful experience for the majority of players; if you are unfortunately not one among which, below are some general tips you should keep in mind when facing a new level:

First things first, check out what exactly each button controls; some buttons may only become accessible after several reincarnations - do so nonetheless, or you could miss some important pieces of the whole picture, especially as the difficulty increases.

With a clearer idea on your immediate environment at mind, time to deduce a way out of the contraption, a.k.a. puzzle-solving. Usually speaking, the more complicated it is, the simpler to ponder it in a backward manner, namely from the goal to the start. Also, due to the unique nature of the game, your first self commonly needs to go enabling some crucial passageway and has to stay the longest on the field.

Ultimately, if you are unable to predict or manipulate too much into upcoming events, just do things step by step and, whenever you spot anything going wrong, rewind and think over again. Do not be afraid of cloning yourself six or even ten times to do the job, sometimes it helps and sometimes it's just necessary. Last hint is for several harder stages, it is important to plan your route for an environment that yet exist but is going to be created by later selfs.


Causal Gamer Badge (hard – 30 points)
Complete the easy, basic, medium, hard, and bonus levels.

If regrettably you are not too good at this kind of things, the author's being very nice by offering a full video walkthrough of all 40 levels, which you can access right on the main menu of the game.

Rating



Despite numerous bugs of minor severity, the entertaining concept and the challenging content make this game worth your playing.


: Recommended


(Read into the full article...)

2008/05/11

Warlords: Call to Arms



When I first loaded up "Warlords: Call to Arms" in my browser, I thought it was from the same development team that created "Feudalism"; it turned out to be a wrong shot, but the striking resemblance - or shall I say the unbelievable similarity of the forms and factors of retardation within - just made such guess so genuinely true.

Field of Corpses Badge (easy – 5 points)
Score 100 kills during a single campaign.

I am never quite sure why shits like this that should go to sewage could constantly receive badges or highlights on Kongregate; maybe Kongregate likes shits, or maybe shits like Kongregate, I don't know. At any rate, I failed to spot anything about this game that could add the tiniest bit of positiveness to the brand that sponsors it. Intriguingly, the unreasonably high rating of the game on Kongregate seemingly suggests that Kongregate is being very successful in mustering an audience whose major portion is akin to Kongregate in terms of tastes about games.


Medieval Unity Badge (medium – 15 points)
Conquer all 25 maps with any race.

The only thing good about this shit pile is that it offers a wide variety of methods including .sol editing and others for the players to dick their heads towards total dominations, but the simplest is no doubt through a universal Flash trainer that can also connect to the servers of Kongregate, namely Katana or Niflheim:




[How to Kongregate] A Niflheim Demo on Warlords: Call to Arms


Anger not those of you purists for whatever reasons that are right now reading this article, below is also a thorough walkthrough, definitely legit, that will aid you greatly in your endless pursuit of the most purest gameplay:

► Walkthrough

Rating



Even cruder than "Feudalism", this is a game for true cunts and purists.


(Read into the full article...)

2008/05/09

Castle Crashing "The Beard"



'Castle Crashing "The Beard"' is a teaser (pun yes) on the upcoming Xbox 360 Live Arcade "Castle Crashers". Kinda confusing though, didn't see any castle crashing or being crashed. Duh.

Wool Whacker Badge (easy – 5 points)
Level up.

Yeh, just level up. You can do that right? Hitting the tombstones also helps.


Fulp Fiction Badge (medium – 15 points)
Defeat Tom Fulp.

Whoopee cheating time!

► Cheat

To access and modify the values of these variables, use either Katana or Niflheim:




[How to Kongregate] Castle Crashing "The Beard" Easy Hacking Demo


If you are new to all these, watch our tutorials on the right side of the page, under the "Highlight" section, above "Echoes"; they will show you how to hook these two universal Flash trainers onto the Kongregate server to send out your hacked stats for those nasty badges.


Speed Razor Badge (hard – 30 points)
Defeat Tom Fulp in under 4 minutes.

Stupid speedrun. Good for us that this can also be resolved through the same way as above.

► Cheat

Rating



Something fun? Probably. Something dumb? Certainly.


(Read into the full article...)

Doeo



"Doeo" is a rip-off of the Japanese "Moai no Su" (literally "Nest of Moai"), originally created by Miyazawa Takahirou on 2005 in Flash, with an expanded version ported to Shockwave on 2007. If you've seen "Moai no Su" prior to your rencounter with "Doeo", you should be able to tell this is nothing really new or thrilling.

Rodoeo Badge (easy – 5 points)
Wrangle up 500 total pink Doeos.

You can probably go hit the wall with your nut head if you can't do this one, huh.


Profesioeo Badge (medium – 15 points)
Load up "easy" mode and score 30,000 points, and destroy the king in under 20 seconds.

If you can't do this one, it's a good sign you should either clean you mouse or just buy a new one. Or, yeh, go hit the wall with your dickhead. Or pussy lips. Or whatsoever.


New Doeo King Badge (hard – 30 points)
Defeat the king in "hard" mode.

Defeating the King is not that hard but reaching the final stage in hard mode might be. So again it's cheats' time:




[How to Kongregate] Doeo Made Easy - Yet Another Katana Hacking Demo


A more complete list of various useful variables, offered by several community members on our Forum:

► Cheat

Rating



Well, despite non-originality in concept, the content is still original and quite well-stitched, which I have to admit, hence I am recommending it for the sake of a 5-minute-fun, but not going to give it a score higher than 4. Also, some trivia about this game if you are ever interested.


: Recommended


(Read into the full article...)

2008/05/03

Colorfill



Drawing squares or circles to fill the screen up - you must have had plenty of these before already. Well you are about to have yet another one - "Colorfill".

Prismatic Rampage Badge (easy – 5 points)
Destroy 10 total shapes across all levels completed.

This one is kinda cheap. Just in case - by destroy it means to seal a shape with a color block that's having a different color with the said shape.


You're Doing It Wrong Badge (medium – 15 points)
Duplicate 3 shapes in a single level, then complete that level.

Also a very easy one. To duplicate, seal a shape with a block, both being in the same color.


Spectral Selection Badge (hard – 30 points)
Complete all 21 levels.

This game is being more sadistic than other Qix-variants in that the players are only allowed to draw straight lines, which can be so nasty when the field is just one big huge rectangular, and, unfortunately, such condition was purposely made into those bonus shits.

Well, good for us, there is a leak of some sort that can lead us away from such inhumanity:




[How to Kongregate] Colorfill Cheat - Making Flying Triangles to Disappear


Stumbled upon this one while searching for lives and so on.

► Cheat

Rating



Seems to be too generous a score but it just happens that the hue of the game pleased me somehow.


(Read into the full article...)

2008/05/01

Onslaught 2



"Onslaught 2" - nothing more but yet another tower defense cliché.

Bloated Defense Budget Badge (easy – 5 points)
Spend $100,000 across all games.

A fast and licit way to achieve this one is to replay the tutorial repetitively in which it gives some ten thousand of money for you to spend; but of course we are going after more explicit cheating - this does not like the kind of "Sonny" that deserves our respect.

► Cheat


PC Load Letter Badge (medium – 15 points)
Defeat 2,000 enemies on "medium" in a normal game type.

Well, there's no fast and licit way this time.

► Cheat


To the Extreme! Badge (hard – 30 points)
Score 1,500 kills in "extreme" mode.

If you are having problems with Niflheim specifically, I've got some time to create a video for it, finally:




[How to Kongregate] A Niflheim Tutorial - Hacking Onslaught 2


You need .NET Framework to make Niflheim properly working, which is the most common reason if yours are not.

By the way, Extreme Mode will only be unlocked after enduring over 200 waves in a normal game.

Rating



Yes, there are some fun values, but the fact it begins to lag a fucking lot when the towers and creeps starting to occupy the screen just dwarfed and destroyed all the enjoyment. Like I already mentioned inside the Sonny post, there are some that are suitable for Flash and some that are not, and apparently here is just one another vivid negative example; the game basically went semi-frozen with a horribly low framerate when it ended up like this for me:




Reminded me of a good old game called FreeSpace 2:




O those memorable days. Duh.


(Read into the full article...)